Chapter 17: April 19th, 1992
When Mark finished his fourth round of mouthwash (just to be sure), he found Cesar laying sprawled across his old childhood bed, shoes kicked off with his legs dangling off the side. He loved how quickly Cesar always made himself at home when he was visiting. Even before they started dating for real, his usual uptight and mild-mannered demeanor would fizzle away the moment he stepped into Mark’s room, finally able to relax and be himself for a little while.
“Can you imagine if you never moved out of here?”
Mark dropped himself onto the bed next to him. The mattress dipped and caved under his weight. This bed was once plenty big for him, but now it would be way too small to be comfortable. “Yeah, we wouldn’t be doing the sort of shit we’ve been doing, I would think.”
Cesar clicked his tongue. “What if we still did? Would that be fucked up or what?”
“It would be. If that was a suggestion then I’m sorry, but I’m not on board.”
“Buzzkill,” Cesar mumbled under his breath, kicking his legs against the bedframe.
“We don’t have to cross every line known to man, you know. Like, we seriously don’t. Some things can be left untainted.”
“But it would be fun,” he said, as he sat up again, leaning against Mark’s shoulder. He leaned in close and lowered his voice. “You also just sucked my cock on Easter Sunday. Should you be talking?”
Mark opened his mouth to snap back at him, but nothing came out except stutters, fumbling over his words until he finally settled on something simple. “Fuck you.”
“Yeah, I know.” Cesar nuzzled himself in closer to Mark, not caring that the brunette was trying very hard to pretend that he wanted to push him away. “You do it at least twice a week.”
“Oh my fucking God,” Mark groaned, covering his face in his hands. “I can’t believe you. Or me. I can’t believe we did that. There’s something wrong with us, Cesar.”
“And we both love it.”
Mark rubbed his face. Yeah, he did love it, and he hated that he loved it. He wrapped an arm over Cesar’s shoulder and kissed the side of his face. If he was fucked up and depraved, then he was glad his boyfriend was just as gross. Cesar didn’t have to go along with this shit today, but he still did and loved every second of it. Just as Mark did every time Cesar had something new he wanted to try.
They were quiet for a while until Cesar broke the silence again. “I love learning all the little things about you. All the stuff you like. It’s fun, and I don’t want it to stop.”
Mark could feel the blood rushing to his face. “I… Yeah, me too. Maybe I can find something… new? For the next time we have a moment alone.” He found himself staring into Cesar’s shoulder. They’ve done so much together, and yet, he couldn’t bring himself to look him in the eyes as he said that.
Cesar jokingly shoved him away. “What?! That’s my job! I have to try all the weird shit on you to see what fun facts about yourself you’re hiding from me!”
With an awkward smile, Mark shoved back. “And who’s been buying the toys?” Then he leaned in real close to Cesar’s face, close enough that they could feel each other’s breath on their faces, and pushed him down on the bed by his chest and asked with a devilish whisper, “And who’s been loving the toys?”
What happened next was another one of their silly wrestling matches, with Mark holding the advantage as he always tended to do. The two boys got tangled up in each other and rolled around on the bed, the occasional string or fiber catching and sticking to their suits, until Cesar managed to get a leg up on Mark and pin him down. But just as he began to gloat about his victory, Mark reached up for Cesar’s neck with both hands, with no real intent but knowing exactly what kind of response he would get, which was Cesar flinging himself away until he was sitting back on the bed and scrambling and far back on the bed as he could without falling off.
“Hey, hey! Illegal move!”
“And what are you going to do about it? Get the referee involved?”
The two stood up together, giggling and straightening each other’s clothes out and picking off the pieces of string and hair that clung to them. “Look what you did, Mark. We probably need to fix our hair again.”
“Your hair’s fine. Let’s just go before someone starts asking questions.”
“I think the only one who’s going to ask is Sarah.”
Mark cringed. “Fuck, you’re right.”
“But, listen,” he said, getting closer and lowering his voice, “If you want to make a contest out of revealing our deepest secrets to each other… I’m not opposed. Just so you know.”
When Cesar put it like that, and with a flutter of his eyelashes… “Okay, fine, I… I guess that sounds like fun.”
“You just can’t decide if you want to be devious or bashful, can you?”
“At least I have some shame.”
“You don’t. You pretend you do, but you don’t.”
Mark sighed, but with a tired smile. There was just no winning with this guy. He hauled off and gave Cesar’s ass a firm slap, making him squeak and jolt upright. “Fine. You got me. But we need to go.”
Cesar snapped out of his shock and pecked a kiss on Mark’s cheek. “See? I’m always right.”
They put their shoes back on and started walking back down the hallway, back to where the rest of the family was finishing dinner. There really wasn’t any winning with him, they both knew it, but the truth was that Mark didn’t mind it at all.
I’m going to lose every argument for the rest of my life. But I think I can live with that.
Just as they expected, they got weird looks from Sarah as soon as they got back. Mark knew he had to brace for impact, because this next exchange was going to go south real fucking fast. He just hoped Cesar would help. Or just let him do the talking. Whatever was more convenient for him at the time, depending on what kind of “contribution” Cesar felt like making.
“Where were you two?” she asked, her voice carrying an edge of accusation. This was already an interrogation, and Mark was on the defensive.
“My old room.”
“Why?”
“Because we used to hang out there all the time before I moved out.”
Sarah was squinting hard at him the entire time he spoke. “Is your tongue blue?”
Oh. Fuck. “Huh? No, no. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Let me see.”
Mark put a few steps between himself and her. “Man, I’m not letting you look in my mouth, what’s wrong with you?”
She wouldn’t have it. She stepped in closer. “What’s wrong with you? Just let me see.”
Mark looked at Cesar. He only gave Mark a cheeky smile and wave. “Okay, look, it’s not what it looks like.”
“Oh my God, Mark. You didn’t. ”
“I just forgot to brush my teeth this morning, so I did it now—”
Her voice was quiet, but harsh like a mother scolding her child for misbehaving in the middle of a sermon. “On Easter fucking Sunday, are you serious? ”
“Okay, hold on a second, why am I the only one catching heat for this?!”
“Because with Cesar, it’s like… expected. But you should know better.”
She said that so matter-of-factly, Mark was speechless. Cesar, on the other hand, couldn’t stop himself from laughing. Mark would have to make fun of him later for the dorky little snort between giggles. He’d get him for this, he swore it.
Sarah shook her head and started to walk past Mark, then stopped next to Cesar. “Oh, your mom’s insane in the kitchen, by the way. I hope she’s teaching you, because Mark will never be good at cooking in his entire life. I’ve never seen anyone else screw up scrambled eggs the way he does.”
Cesar’s laughing turned into full-on unrestrained cackling, and part of Mark wished he could just die and take Cesar down with him. First the Easter Sunday blowjob, and now he’s getting shredded by his kid sister. Great. At least he could take his “frustrations” out on Cesar later.
